| Noose... |
Here's my theory. I have been on a journey my whole life. Every now and then, I find something and pick it up. It attaches to me. Some things attach to my skin; they don't matter too much to me. Other things matter a lot. They attach themselves to my heart. The question is, what would life be like if I just tore everything away from myself. The little stuff would tear my skin, but I would live through it. But it is hard to know if I could survive tearing apart my own heart. I don't know if I could do it. If I did, I wouldn't hurt those that I love anymore. I wouldn't be there to confuse them, or make them feel sad or guilty. I wouldn't be the negative in their lives anymore. The downside is, naturally, I could die from it. But to me, what if it is worth sparing my loves from all the suffering that I bring upon them? Should I do it? Could I? Of course I could, but would they let me? I don't know.
I have an idea, fuckhead! Pull yourself together. Live with it. Stop being such a pompous asshole and deal with the little shit that life shoves in your face. That's what life is. Besides, in twenty years, is this shit really going to matter to you anyway? Stop your fucking sniveling and be a fucking man, or beast, or whatever the fuck you think you are. Just go out there with something to prove and have a great goddamn time. I am tired of your bitching and whining and complaining all the mother fucking time. Shut up you cry-baby son-of-a-bitch. Shit.
You know what? Fuck you. And you. You too. Fuck all of you. I don't need you. I don't want you. Go the fuck away. Leave me alone. Get on your fucking knees and beg for your pathetic life. You tire me. Go to Hell, before I send you there.
Stop it. Quit fighting. What's the point? We're all going to die eventually anyway, so why not make the best of the time we have.
That's just it. The time we have isn't enough time. There's never enough time. I can't get anything done. I run out of time. Time is a bitch.
Shut your freaking pie-hole. Seriously. You need to calm the fuck down and take it easy for once in your miserable life. Jesus Christ.
Thanks guys. I think I figured it all out.
I'm no schizo. I just have friends who love me, live in me, died to be in me. So maybe you don't hear them. So maybe I never told anyone about them. Who fucking cares. They are dead, but within me they live. I love them all. They love me. Life is good. Go fuck it up, why don't you.
When Everything Was Ugly... - And Ugly It Remains...